The Season of Giving
December is a magical month filled with fun celebrations and good cheer. I love all the great food and the sweet treats like cookies, chocolate, and hot cocoa. Everything is decorated and holiday music is playing. There are lots of holiday TV shows and movies to watch. Nature even helps by dropping a fresh covering of snow to make things look even better. For a lot of people, it is their favorite time of the year.
However, some people don't enjoy December and can't wait for it to be over. They are suffering from depression, sadness, and loss. They see everyone else living great lives and having fun. They focus on what is wrong with their life. They feel like they don't fit in, so they put on a fake smile and isolate themselves to avoid the unpleasant reminders.
When I was younger, I tended to focus more on receiving presents. It wasn't until I got older that I learned to appreciate the magic of giving to others. The phrase "It is better to give than receive" finally made sense. Today, I get much more satisfaction out of unconditionally giving to others without the expectation of receiving anything in return. That feeling of love that gets generated is amazing to me and much more valuable than anything else I could ever receive.
While a lot of December is focused on giving presents and money, it can also be about connecting with others and providing emotional support. Giving your time to help others is often the most valuable thing you can provide.
If December is a good month for you, then I encourage you to be on the lookout for those who see it as a bad month. They aren’t as easy to identify as you might think. They are good at hiding their negative situation. There’s no way to tell from surface conversations. You have to dig a little deeper.
For example, I once had a former coworker who seemed perfectly happy and content. It wasn’t until I began to look closer that I discovered he was actually homeless and had been living out of his car for over two years. No one else knew, not even his family and friends. He didn’t want to talk about it. He just wanted to have a normal day like we used to have. So, I took him out to lunch, and we walked around the mall together for a couple of hours, talking about the good old days. He didn’t want any handouts. I told him that today was my turn to buy. He could buy next time.
This year is a bit more difficult. There are a lot of people who are out of work and who are down on their luck. This crazy inflation over the past couple of years has made things even worse. The gap between the haves and have nots has dramatically increased. So, if things are going well for you, then please be a little extra understanding, kind, generous, and inclusive with others who need a healthy dose of your support. Ask them how you can help. Give to them unconditionally and enjoy the feeling of love it creates for both of you.
If December is a bad month for you, then remember that your habits, which consist of what you think, feel, say, and do, are all connected. Improving one can help improve the others, creating an upward spiral. If you are feeling depressed, then you might focus on improving your thoughts and remind yourself of all the good things that are going on for which you are grateful. You might meditate to clear your mind of negative thoughts and focus on your breathing or your surroundings. Or you might say positive affirmations to help you improve your mood.
Connecting with others can help. Find some friends who you can confide in or who can help cheer you up. Donate your time to help others in need. Spend some extra time with your pet or go to the local animal shelter to interact with some animals who are craving attention and a good home.
We often have the most control over our actions. By taking deep breaths, we can calm down. By going for a walk, we can increase blood flow and generate some positive endorphins. By going for a long run, lifting weights, or using a punching bag we can get rid of our negative energy. Or we can do yoga, which works on both the body and mind at the same time.
If none of this works, then it might be time to seek professional help so you can get back on track. There are lots of resources available, so just pick one that you think will work best for you.
Regardless of which method you choose, please keep in mind that you are important and your life matters. You are lovable. You are worthy. You are more than good enough. You belong. There are people who are desperately waiting for you to show up and lead the way. You might be the only one who is able to help and who wants to help.
Thank you for reading this newsletter and for helping us get the word out that there are lots of ways to make things better. We hope you have a very Happy Holiday Season full of good food, fun, and all those you hold dear.
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